just realized the root of all of my anxiety and frustration...clutter. i have now realized to be truly happy, i must live in a home that looks like a well kept office or hotel room. i think i like the hotel room example better.
LOVE clean, unadulterated counters.
just realized it though. although Heavenly Father knows it too, he mentions in my patriarchal blessing that i should keep my home "orderly" and "neat".
interesting...(he really knows i am a packrat).
anyway, yesterday went on a rampage of sorts and cleaned off the "junk pile" spot in my kitchen...and that's how i refer to it even when someone asks me where something is..."uh, go look in the junk pile". sure enough, it usually is there stacked in all the random papers and wedding invites and medical receipts and basketball schedules and jewelry that people take off. all amongst the bottles of vitamins and pens and pencils that dont work and the priceless little kid drawings that you hang on to because you dont want a certain someone to find them in the trash and be scarred for life. you know what i mean. hate the shoe issue too. shoes everywhere. had a pile of at least 10 pair of shoes in the kitchen. and why is my kitchen the landing spot for EVERYTHING? and i also have the toy issue. when i had hunter and realized he was going to be my last child, one of the fantasies i had frequently was a life without toys everywhere, and the simple fact that i could lay scissors down on the table and not worry about some child getting killed, and also the fact that no little curious hands would be fumbling through my drawers constantly, misplacing everything i own. well, that fantasy was short lived, because now we have dane, who loves to paint everything. so i now have to guard the finish on my table with my life, and worry about green paint being spilled on my upholstery. he also has these little legos all over the house, along with several swords and shields and loads of video game paraphernalia. most of these things i am describing are all of an inch square. so i have all of these little teeny expensive things scattered all over the house. along with the swords and shields of course, are all the dent marks in my walls...love them too.
i know, i know i will miss all of this one day.
i sound like such a grump.
anyhow, back to my clutter...
so i cleaned it all out of my kitchen. i cannot believe how much better i feel.
now i just have to organize it all into the office.
what a chore.