the art of readjusting...

emma is gone...driveway empty, no lavender glow coming from her room at night...aenon been gone for awhile now...time for the readjusting period. just trying to get used to the different

dynamics around here. weird.

my life is one big emotional roller coaster.

big girls now

currently i am in the salt lake airport...waiting for my jetblue flight. got emma all settled in, would have liked to have done more, but we fit all that we could in and still half

way enjoyed ourselves. however, missing my dane big time.

our trip was started on thursday morning, and was boring and uneventful. mr Landcruiser took care of us beautifully...nothing broke, nothing blew up and we arrived in one piece. stopped in vegas for emma's last in and out burger, then a pit stop in st george for that amazing custard we always get. then on to wall mart in cedar city for more treats and a trip to the potty. got gas in beaver, my moms old stomping grounds...just had to take a photo of the "B" and the cows in the foreground. had our windows washed by a gas station attendant named Nephi. it was written right there on his gas station attendant shirt. had to see it to believe it.

we like to live large, you know.

found provo had not changed at all, and started our day with the exciting IKEA trip, then various target runs complete with a stop at iceberg for a shake...i swear i eat like a pig when i am in provo...oh, also had a five guys burger...officially better than in and out, i am afraid. anyway, still never found the coveted ethernet cable (every student in the state needs one).

i guess emma's on her own for that one.

aenon is living in salt lake now (in a cute, rustic 70s apartment building close to the U), so we decided to hang around the city yesterday. we found a cute little greek cafe, nestled amongst amazing architecture and the shade of the tall buildings. this little restaurant had really good hummus and a decent chicken gyro...but the olives were the favorite. would have been a tad more enjoyable if the babbling homeless man with no hands, and his pants completely undone had decided to find another place to hang out (i know, i felt sorry for him)... but all in all a nice little adventure in the big city. however, emma has decided she likes the "comfort" and "safety" provo provides. so i guess p town isnt so bad after all.

emmas apartment is darling, complete with new black furniture and super cute roommates. her situation could not be better. i am thrilled she is where she is, ready to embark on this next new chapter in her life. aenon too, i am glad she is where she is too. we stopped at the U bookstore, visited the BEAUTIFUL library and paid for some expensive books. she "fits" at the U, where it is "real life" as she says, not some pseudo, sheltered world at the Y.

i must say i have to agree with her.

i am finding out slowly but surely my big girls dont need me as much as they used to...i am finding my place now behind the scenes a little. kind of weird for me, i will admit. not sure how all of this feels, but i am learning my place. i am not the hands on mother i am to the others...sometimes it is hard to find where i fit. these kids are my life...just need to let them spread their wings all by themselves now. i am grateful for the independent people they are. the women they have become. i am thankful i am their mom,

even if they dont need me that much anymore...

its a good thing.

road trip again

no internet till now, so i probably wont post till tomorrow. having a great time in the beehive state...

thank you mr landcruiser

so emma and i are headed to utah this morning...our trusty Landcruiser

going to get us there safely.

it waits patiently in the driveway, ready to take her to some exciting shopping excursion or pinkberry at the spectrum. i think its favorite place to go is the sushi place.

so mr Landcruiser, take care of my darling emma in the utah snow and rain and terrible weather up there. i am well aware you have probably saved her precious life many times before. your sturdy wheels and sheer weight are phenomenal in the snow. keep up the good work. I will miss seeing you everyday in the driveway, and occasionally climbing into you and being amazed at how smooth and sure you are...even in your golden years. you are a remarkable vehicle, and i feel privileged to know you.

who wants french toast?

so hunter's schedule is this: practice 6am-8am, then goes back 11am to 2pm. when he comes home at 8, having put in a full workout as the others slumber the morning away, he is famished. starving as he would say. he says thinking about what he's going to eat for breakfast helps him get through his arduous workout in the pool. i tell him a little food fantasy never hurt anyone.

so he came home and made french toast for everyone, complete with a sprinkling of brown sugar.

we didn't have any bananas or he would have completed the course with peanut butter and bananas laced throughout the fat cinnamon slices.

i think i should face the fact i am never going to be thin as long as my children are alive.

doo dah heaven

so i have a new calling...enrichment assistant. (i think that's what it is called and am still a little peeved over my release from nursery). however, this new calling is opening doors for me. i am all proud of myself because i haven't used a glue gun in years...had given up on anything that looks even remotely like a craft, in reality actually just fantasized about it...and read plenty about it (love Martha Stewart's craft encyclopedia...i swear i could read that book over and over), but cant handle the mess and the storage it entails. so i threw away all of my crafty paraphernalia years ago, and succumbed to the boring life of a non-crafty woman. i have to say, i enjoyed my sabbatical, empty, uncluttered cupboards and all, but have now rejoined the cult...have used a glue gun now 3 days in a row and have made a gargantuan mess. made this glorious little advent calendar, complete with a little doo dah for every day of december to place on the tree. i will admit i have enjoyed the feel of that gun in my hands, and paint under my fingernails again.

fun to use my creative brain side, so glad it hadn't atrophied to its death...

however it did help to have a picture to go from.

hunter the fetus in trunks

smores, jacuzzi, underwater photo sesh sans flash.

tail end of a perfect sunday.

bigger kitchen please

why is it that when you come home from any sort of vacation, be it mini or not, the house becomes a giant, unorganized mess, and the bag issue takes on a life of it's own? or is it just me...who's family lives (and dumps it's stuff) in a 200 square feet space (the kitchen) in a 4700 square foot house. does anyone else have this same problem? i swear i need to just live in a giant kitchen with two giant sized tables. one for eating, the other one for a super-sized junk pile.

who needs bedrooms?

back to real life...

well, looks as if i am facing the hard realization that summer is winding down, the most dreaded time of year for me. i hate this time of year with a passion. love having my kids all home, love the open doors and the sound of water splashing in the backyard. love the sandy back seats and the sunburned cheeks. love finding teenagers sprawled on the couch in the morning, the sound of laughter in the wee hours of the night. love everything about summer, except the end of it...and it is just around the corner.

on monday hunter starts "shell" week for polo (which translates into 2 very long practices a day, then an overnight beach trip where they train rigorously in the ocean for 3 days)...his life of leisurely playing mario kart for hours is ending. he keeps asking me..."what day is it?" (dont you just love the fact that we dont even know what day it is...) i know he is dreading monday like the plague.

back to real life, hunter (and everyone else).

the party is over.

still in hawaii

so i still am imagining i am in hawaii. the hour and a half drive i am pretending was the 5 hour plane ride...the brown desert hills i am painting green in my head...actually have some cloud cover this morning, so the weather is cooperating too...hmmm.

ps i love you

i remember in high school it was a big deal to go with a bunch of friends to palm springs for the weekend. it was kind of an adult rite of passage...unfortunately i was never allowed to go. i dont think anything really happened there, just lots of laying out by the pool, movies and dinner out. although i wasnt born yesterday on second thought...things probably DID happen...

who am i kidding. maybe its a good thing i didnt go.

anyway, there has always been an allure with palm springs for me. maybe its the constant sunshine which i think i actually need to live, maybe its the beautiful expansive desert...maybe its the glorious warm nights...i mean, c'mon where else can you go where it is 95 degrees at 10pm? i think the warm nights are just magic. and the room rate didnt hurt either...76 bucks for a suite at the westin. makes it even more fun when it is cheap.

we have been coming here for years, as sort of a summer kick off or a summer ending mini vacation. this year the latter. and usually sans dad. has always been a girl trip, although this year we decided to bring everyone. we have thrown a few boys into the mix. so far so good.

last night we did the usual. dinner at the yard house, a long drawn out venture into borders and then a treat. eden and i wanted cheesecake. the rest wanted ben and jerrys. everyone was happy. although the ice cream eaters were so excited their splurge was less caloric than the cheesecake. who knew premium ice cream was diet food?

and shhh...dont tell anyone...are pretending we are in hawaii.

time to print

found a company who prints and binds your blog. better get busy and get it done. it has been a year since i started this thing...pretty cool.

check it out.

blog2print.com

silly boys and tesoro registration

put my card reader in the computer, and up came 225 photos of these silly boys doing acrobatics into the pool...emma capturing every split second on the camera. hilarious. especially max in a speedo. don't see this too often.

that was last night...lots of fun in the pool, then burgers on the grill.

a house full of teenagers. liz was over too.

way fun.

then we woke up to the horrible reality of tesoro registration.

no words describe this torturous errand.

uggh.

love at the little green house

so we spent our sunday afternoon visiting with old friends. very fun to eat great food and talk with friends who we have known forever, but haven't seen in a very long time. friends who were just a house away at one point, and a boy who became my pseudo son. was at my home almost every day when my kids were small. in the summertime-he was permanently there...always found a sleeping spot on the couch or even the floor. he became an integral part of our family. he was always with us. i can still see him in the rear view mirror of my suburban, in the back back seat. he frequently led the kids on treks in the fields behind my home looking for large tadpoles in the spring ponds. they were carefully brought home to a makeshift aquarium then watched over while they became large croaking frogs. after their miraculous morph, they were let loose in my yard. their constant croaking became a reminder of the fun experience. he was a walking science experiment. one time made "snail soup" in a bucket after his chore for the day was to gather all the pesky snails from the yard. added all sorts of "ingredients". all boy he was, and i loved every minute spent with him...and so did the kids. he was always respectful and helpful. was the first one out to help bring the groceries in...he climbed on the roof one day (without my knowledge) and thought it was fun to jump off of it into the grass below. my innocent little kids all lined up looking on in awe,

too chicken to ever do anything like that.

he did that once.

so i got to see him yesterday. he is all grown up now, but i still see the same little boy in that big, lanky body now. his big blue eyes the same clear naive orbs i looked into years ago. i love him and his family...his mother a cultured, educated woman who loves beautiful things and is a talented artist...who my eden would quietly find then climb onto her lap during church. i can still see eden walking up the aisle by herself after i located kathy in the congregation, then pointed her out. she was all of 3 or 4. we talked yesterday about the time we went to the beach in la jolla where she introduced my kids to snorkeling...eden at that time was about 2 or 3 would NOT wear a bathing suit. kathy and i (i think were the only ones who thought it was cute) proceeded with our beach day like she was fully clothed. one old lady commented to kathy..."you may think that is cute, but it is not!" my friend kathy wasnt phased. she shrugged her shoulders

and we continued with our beach day,

naked child in tow.

we ate yesterday at kathys oldest daughters cute little green bungalow in orange...nicole, an intellectual genius...a darling, beatnik bookworm and kind hearted soul. she's travelled abroad extensively and was beautifully educated back east. she teaches high school to ap kids and loves it. she has found her niche. i am sure she is the favorite of all of those high schoolers. she was always there for my children when they were young as my favorite babysitter. she swam with them, painted with them, and even changed many a diaper. she, becoming the older sister they always wanted. her little home now a quaint hideaway, complete with beach cruiser on the porch and an old fashioned hammock on the tucked away lawn.

love her owl collection too.

and the bonus for the day...i was thrilled to get a glimpse of the wild parrots who live in orange. a simply amazing sight. numerous noisy green parrots in a tree...unbelievable. supposedly a truck carrying the birds crashed and they escaped years ago. wonder if that is an urban legend...AND fell in love with old orange.

super cute little city tucked away in the middle of the OC.

so thank you nicole for your generous hospitality. loved every minute spending time with you,

my old, very special friends.

seemed like a family reunion.

sunday morning cry

pretty self explanatory. love most creatures who walk on four legs for some reason. even the ones who throw up at the foot of my bed..eaten socks too difficult to digest. love the sound of toby vomiting in the middle of the night. cant live without him though, and all of the quirky little things he does. so thank you toby for being the loyal friend i need in my life.

what happens after pinkberry...

this is what happens when you take 4 teenagers/young adults to the spectrum with their dad. they totally know how to work him, especially emma. and a small fortune contained in these 7 unassuming bags. i must say...i am the practical one. lets just say

i am done with school shopping.

however, totally worth it for pinkberry...

that time of year

as the summer winds down, and kids go back to school, i am reminded of the fact that no longer are we all together as a family like the old days. the time when all of the kids were safe under one roof, and around me 24/7 is gone. now i have 2 spreading their wings even in another state. the distance sometimes makes my heart ache. however, with all of this very normal growing up, which happens to every person i know...(it's not supposed to happen to me) we need to take time to snap a few photos, document time, and hire a professional to do it right. so we contacted tiffany of tiffany portraits to do the dirty work. she was wonderful, and so patient with our weird group. her website is here. i brought my camera along for emma and me to take some shots in between her works of art...i think she might even be able to make us all look angelic. tough job, but i think she just might be able to pull it off. so, these are a few of us waiting for our specific time to pose. very fun, but boy was i exhausted when i got home.

all of that smiling is tiring.

and why is picture day so stressful?

must eat fish

made salmon last night on the grill. super good and surprisingly everyone ate it. even dined outside al fresco...got my backyard back. i am happy.

the sunny traveler has returned

well, retrieved emma from the san diego airport last night safe and sound. basically i wont be able to write all the exciting things down about her trip because there are too many experiences to properly document...and no fun being told by someone who didnt even experience it...so please refer to her blog to hear about it first hand.

i am sure she will be blogging a ton and shes a great storyteller. as of now, she is sleeping...probably wont see her for awhile.

she was lit up and talked non stop when we picked her up around 9:00 last night. aenon and i were glued to her stories...some of them very funny. she realized that we americans have too much superfluous "stuff" around us, and was so impressed with the italians simplicity.

their goodness. she even met a man whos life was changed by cameron, who introduced the gospel to him and was instrumental in coordinating the building of a home for him. he is now married and expecting a child, previously penniless and homeless. his life forever changed by a humble 19 year old. she told us about the tender reunion when this man

who diligently sells fruit on the street saw cameron.

priceless.

i have to thank these darling boys who served their missions in italy for taking good care of her. apparently blondes (and americans) attract a lot of attention there, so i do believe having these strapping young men by the girls sides was helpful. also i think the fact that they spoke fluent italian was crucial...a trip never to be duplicated, i am afraid. even the times when the boys spoke italian amongst themselves in order to not alarm the girls because they were in a particularly scary situation involving being lost and large rocks and night setting in.

kind of like when the nail ladies speak in vietnamese and you wonder

what they are saying about your toes?

so i stole a few of her photos from her memory card...cannot give proper descriptive details about the images, but know one is of the pieta, a Michelangelo masterpiece (one of my personal favorites) sistine chapel (i think) and venice.

how would i know-never been to italy...wonder when it will be my turn?