finally enjoyed my stay

of all the vacations we have taken over the years, i have come to realize this last trip to kauai was the best. it was the very first one where i was actually relaxed. it was the first vacation i actually took a breath and looked around and tried to take in the amazing array of greens in the foliage, the amazing colors of the sky and water and the "feel" of hawaii. i finally have learned to calm down, relax and enjoy the ride. it has only taken me what, 20 years or so to figure it all out. maybe it's the fact that my children now are able to dress themselves, entertain themselves and find their own toothbrush and actually go the next step and brush their own teeth without having to be reminded 100 times-imagine that....i think that is it. my children are growing up. i have found the anecdote to my mild frustration all these years. i do admit i am missing, the total dependence, the nurturing and hands on care that became second nature. made me feel like a real mother. now i am more of a mother in carefully chosen words of encouragement and boosting self esteem-guiding gently through this crazy maze of life-rather than the mother whose hands fed, dressed and doted meticulously over 5 little children. so on that note, i really enjoyed my vacation this year. loved every bit of it. LOVED spending it with my kids. i wish they would never grow up, but then again, i am enjoying them as big kids now. can't wait till next year...