flower dreams

this day for emma is around the corner.

and today she is in the temple.

thinking of you, darling girl of mine.

which wolf will win?

An elder Cherokee Native American was teaching his grandchildren about life. He said to them, "A fight is going on inside me...It is a terrible fight, and it is between two wolves. One wolf represents fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, pride and superiority. The other wolf stands for joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. This same fight is going on inside of you and every other person too."

They thought about it for a minute and then one child asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?" The old Cherokee simply replied..."The one I feed."

dodgeball anyone?

so i wanted to go watch hunter play dodgeball...

tesoro has this tournament they sponsor at lunchtime.

he was one of the stormin' foremans...

inspired by mr langdale, his beloved chemistry teacher who 

is a construction worker in his spare time.

so they dressed up as construction workers, hard hats and all.

however, eden told me it would be embarrassing for hunter to have me show up.

what?

did i hear correctly?

i was floored.

me, embarrassing?

so...

i snuck into the gym, at the perfect time, peeked my head around the corner and

 took some shots from behind a big wall.

hunter saw me and smiled.

i dont think he was embarrassed at all.

in fact, if the truth be known, i think he was happy to see me.

just as long as i stayed in my little corner, maybe.

moms can be embarrassing, you know.

oh, and they came in 4th overall.

i think crocks with socks (yes, boys in crocks with socks...)

actually won. not to mention the stormin' mormons...

another team which was in the running.

silly boys.

my rock

it was this mans birthday yesterday.

he is my rock.

he is my wisdom and the common sense i lack.

he sticks up for me, supports me and tells me things i need to hear.

and sometimes the things i need to hear are not pleasant.

he is a realist, and isnt afraid to say what he feels.

i like his texas drawl, his size 13 feet, and his toes which are as long as my fingers.

i like his bear hugs, where i dont even come up to his chin 

and the way he walks in front of me and holds his hand out for me to grab.

i like it when he tells me i am gorgeous, and that my cookies are "the best he's ever had".

i like his gregarious personality and how he drives with two feet.

i like it when i cant finish my dinner, and he eagerly cleans my plate too.

i like how we can waste a whole day at the beach together and not think twice.

i like to watch him interact with strangers and make people laugh.

but i think what i like the best is this saying which he recites to me continuously...

"you are in charge of your own destiny."

amen.

and a big happy birthday to you, big boy.

thank you, from the bottom of my heart for all you do for me.

not sure what to say

i think i have used this picture before...

but it seemed to fit this particular post.

i have been stricken with the sickness.

the sickness that everyone in my family has passed around.

i feel TERRIBLE.

sore throat, achy and a persistent cough accompanied with the mother of all headaches.

poor dane is on antibiotics now...dr more said hes plagued with a massive sinus infection,

complete with even a fever and all of the above.

hes managing a nasal spray now too, all by himself...a little chore he will be doing indefinitely.

poor guy.

all this i have to look forward to, however, im going to beat it.

my immune system hasnt been down in years.

i am a rock...so i hope.

so heres to killing an infection with sheer will power.

and i do feel better today.

so, on that note...

it'll all work out.

i just know it.

circle of life

i know, i know, this is a photo of a dead bird.

one who died right in front of me.

took his agonizing last breath on the side of the pool, 

after toby had rescued him from the suffocating and exhausting effects of floundering in cold water.

i found toby watching over him, this little bird between his front feet...

his eyes following me as i made my way toward the scene.

toby looked at me with sad, protective eyes.

i know he tried.

he has saved many a bird for me...

i have stories of toby watching over the birds in the yard.

 he has told me about many birds which needed my care.

on the other hand, maggie would do her best to kill every last one of them.

frick and frack those two.

so i reflected on this tragic but sacred moment.

and realized his death is just as important as his birth.

so i wrapped him carefully in a paper towel and placed him in a dignified spot.

his little body still warm...and i wondered if maybe someone was watching,

and paying attention to the respect i showed him,

in his moment of final surrender.

i wonder.

sun search...

in our sun search, we ended up in lovely el centro, while it was cloudy and cold near the coast...

cage fight anyone?

loved these vintage signs we found on a deserted main street...

and a wall beautifully decorated with whimsical graffiti...

and even this bar was closed on sunday. a literal ghost town...

not only in utah does the town completely shut down.

then we ran into this apache helicopter. those are british soldiers...english accents and all. 

i know this because i heard them speak.

and then this beauty all tucked away under the cover.

protected by the sun we came in search of...

and we found it, clear blue skies and all.

made my heart sing with delight.

i think i was smiling the whole entire time.

especially when i returned with pink cheeks and rosy shoulders.

bring it on, summer.

and we may be visiting el centro more often.

who knew a military base could be so fun?